I’m tired of being an adult.
Really, I am. I know: blah blah blah you’re still young, you haven’t even started, just wait til you (insert crappy adult stuff here).
I’m still sick of it.
The only reason I do grown up things is because I have to or I have panic attacks. I go to work, pay bills, clean the apartment, get the oil changed, go to the grocery store, and open a savings account. Those things take up most of my time in life. And I’d venture to say about 90% of the time, all those things piss me off.
They piss you off too. Don’t lie. You’re getting ready for work every day but what you’re thinking inside your head about all the other, more important, more pleasant things you could be doing. I certainly am. While I’m talking on the phone at work, I’m usually doodling a picture of myself stabbing my ear with a pen repeatedly until I die.
Or flowers. Sometimes I draw flowers.
I started working when I was 16. Kmart, if you’re curious. I was Employee of the Month because I’m a super nerdy overachiever and the only thing to aspire to when you’re working the register is the highest rings per minute. Every day was a race. And I rocked it like a nerdy nerd.
I also wrote an essay likening my supervisor to the devil and described the feeling of my soul slowly rotting while I was at work.
It won first place in a contest at my high school.
Later I moved into the position of car dealership receptionist, then some Victoria’s Secret (and no, I don’t know why they hired me), some overnight stock clerk at Sam’s Club, some scene shop work, and some more receptionist work. And now the Executive Assistant thing. And you know what? My favorite part of all that was when I was laid off for two months.
That was the bees knees.
I have to find a way to pay bills and seem like an adult without really being one. This whole ‘get a day job to pay for things while doing what I like but doesn’t pay at night’ thing is exhausting. Well maybe exhausting isn’t quite the right word.
Soul-sucking. That’s it.
I suppose the best thing I could do is be a teacher. I kind of have to go back to school to get my master’s for that. I’d be more likely to get hired with a doctorate. But once I have it, I can have summers off again. Summers! Entire summers! I could work like it’s part of my life instead of all of it.
Is it wrong to go into a line of work solely for the amount of time you won’t spend at it?
Maybe I can just get all my work angst out in a book. Yeah. Maybe I’ll write a book. Heck, after 2011 who knows what I’ll do with my extra hour-or-more-a-day that I don’t have to write a post. 2012 could be the year of the book. It can be all about the angst of the mid-20’s non-adult. Specifically through the eyes of an Executive Assistant like myself, who works for a woman who wears fashion capes to work. And then I can get published and get paid to write satire.
Maybe then I can have summers off. ♣Today’s RAK: Plugging meters on the busiest street in the neighborhood at lunchtime.