Homelessness and Cocktail Napkins: the Seeds of Fame

21 Jul

I need to stop making bad decisions.

I keep doing this thing where I stay up late, reveling in my irresponsibility, then waking up early and hating myself.  I tell myself I deserve it.  I tell myself I work hard that what’s the point if you don’t get to enjoy life once in a while.  But let’s face it: once in a while is kind of like, every night.  And though I’ve never considered myself a coffee drinker, an unbiased review of my bank statement would reveal a large portion spent at late night establishments followed by a large portion spent the next morning at coffee joints.

That’s pretty hard evidence.

Last night I was out at one of said late night establishments waiting for Dave to finish playing his set so I could go home and pass out and began to write my blog on bar napkins.  The bartender made a comment about J.K. Rowling, author of Harry Potter craziness, and how she started out homeless writing her story on cocktail napkins as well.  And now, well, she’s richer than the Queen of England.

The seeds of fame.

I didn’t have enough alcohol in me to delude myself into thinking that staying up late and scribbling on napkins was going to get me anywhere based on the precedent J.K. Rowling had set.  First and foremost, I’m not homeless.  I feel like that’s an important part of the underdog story there.  Second (and perhaps equally important), I’m not J.K. Rowling.

Still, it would be nice to allow myself to think that recalling my late nights and early, zombie-like mornings this year of my post-a-day extravaganza would be looking back fondly on the blossoming days of my fame. 

But I think I’m just tired.  And I have been for many moons.    There’s nothing fame-endowing about that.

And so this weekend I shall drive into the heart of Virginia to 1) seek out a Lollipop Tuesday of epic proportions and 2) sleep so often and so long that I actually reverse my under-eye dark circles.    My under-eye area will be so light and fresh that people will assume I mismatched my concealer, but really I’ll be basking in the afterglow of Virginia sleep.  I like to think it’s better than Pennsylvania sleep.   At least that’s what I’ll tell myself this weekend when I’m sucking up the sweet nectar of hibernation.

You know, in between writing blog posts on scraps of paper.

12 Responses to “Homelessness and Cocktail Napkins: the Seeds of Fame”

  1. Seasweetie July 21, 2011 at 9:39 am #

    Have a great weekend – Virginia is beautiful and I miss it.

    Like

  2. misswhiplash July 21, 2011 at 9:45 am #

    I ‘ve never been to Virginia so I do not know what it is like, but enjoy yourself and sleep day and night.

    Shall I sing a lullaby?

    Like

    • Jackie July 23, 2011 at 6:47 pm #

      Please! And it’s lovely 🙂

      Like

  3. pegoleg July 21, 2011 at 11:05 am #

    Bar napkins are great for soaking up the seeds of fame, as well as the dregs of Ripple.

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    • Jackie July 23, 2011 at 6:47 pm #

      I attempted to google this but to no avail. Throw me a bone?

      Like

      • pegoleg July 24, 2011 at 11:55 am #

        Don’t they make Ripple anymore? Really, really cheap wine that the winos used to drink out of paper bags when I was a kid. Jeez, am I dating myself!

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        • Jackie July 24, 2011 at 4:52 pm #

          Ooooh okay. Yes, that is the last option on the Wikipedia list at http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ripple . And it’s in the past tense – as “Ripple was a well-known brand of low-end fortified wine” so it must be from the days of yore.

          Thank you for filling me in – so sorry I had to ask haha

          Like

  4. Ro July 21, 2011 at 11:23 am #

    I’m seriously getting tired of reading about my life on your blog. If you’re going to stalk me, at least have the courtesy to say hello. Sheesh.

    Like

    • Jackie July 23, 2011 at 6:46 pm #

      It doesn’t matter if it’s about your life because I published it first. In court, I win. Life = mine.

      Like

  5. thesinglecell July 21, 2011 at 12:19 pm #

    I think there’s plenty to work with here. Lots of famous people started out exhausted and sleepless with nothing on which to write except the scraps they found lying around as they spent their hard-earned money on amusements and forewent air conditioning and a new car. J.K. never thought she’d be rich and famous. Now there are a bunch of British kids who owe her their careers. Pip pip. You’ll strike gold any day!

    Like

    • Jackie July 23, 2011 at 6:45 pm #

      Single, I need a dose of reality, not of hopes and dreams! What’s wrong with you!? 😛

      Like

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