A Writing Prison of My Own Design

6 Sep

I’m in the midst of an incredibly dry and boring writing spell and living in perpetual fear that I won’t make it to the end of the year with a post every day.   In fact, just yesterday (no lie), I was walking around the house talking about how I wished I could just quit and get out from the pressure because my brain wasn’t working.

Sounds like a good time to enter a writing contest.

Happy Lollipop Tuesday, ya’ll!

Okay so let me break it down for you.  I recently wrote a post celebrating my 2/3 completion of the one year long postaday/365 project challenge and ever since have been in the clutches of fear, paralyzed by my stupidity and have wandered on with incoherent, poopy posts.

That’s right: poopy.

Simultaneously, I’ve been wondering what on earth is to become of this monster I’ve made, as its booming success is wildly exciting but also unexpected and terrifying.  Am I supposed to keep posting next year? How often?  Under what premise? What’s to become of me?!  Somewhere, somehow, in the midst of these large life questions, I felt the sudden urge to write elsewhere as well.  

Apparently when I’m hating really hard on writing, my brain ascertains that I should do more of it.  It’s rude.  Also, masochistic.

So in the quest to think of other opportunities for pain and anguish, I considered writing contests.

That’s right: writing contests.

It just so happened that as all this was churning in my squiggly little cerebrum, I was reading Real Simple magazine – which offers straightforward articles on how to live your life more simply.   I always read and rarely act.    But if reading an article about organizing my closet can make me feel like I’m slightly more organized, it’s worth $4.99.

And as I picked and choosed which pieces of advice I wouldn’t be taking in this month’s issue, I noticed an advertisement for their Fourth Annual Life Lessons Contest.    They give you a prompt, you write 1500 words or less, and the winner gets a round trip for 2 for 2 nights in NY to see a Broadway show, lunch with the editors, the article published in the magazine, and $3000 smackos.

Unfortunately, entries have been accepted since May and only continue to be accepted until September 15th.

Yeah – that’s next Thursday.

So I’m in.  I’m doing it.  I mean, the prompt is kind of cheesy (When did you first understand the meaning of love?), but whatever.  I’m going to rock it like a big sucky hurricane.  And yeah, I only have about a week to make it happen but that’s okay too.  Because back when I was a smarty pants in college I would whip out several essays in a single evening.  And those were on comparisons and contrasts of theater in India and theater in China or on what major literary work defines our culture today and why –  so I can do this.  I just have to channel my college mojo.

So that’s my Lollipop Tuesday, folks.  Of course, there’s no immediate gratification for you in regards to my account of suckiness – but you can rest your little heads that between right this moment and 11:59pm on Thursday, September 15th, I will absolutely be sucking.  Hard.    

This blog is a monster; it’s making me do things.  Painful things.

But hey – if I win $3,000 bucks, maybe I’ll use some of it to spruce up the blog a bit.  And since the winner is announced in January, it will be a great time to decide what on God’s green earth is going to come of this blog beast for 2012 anyway. Deal?


It begins.


16 Responses to “A Writing Prison of My Own Design”

  1. veehcirra September 6, 2011 at 9:07 am #

    Hehehe you are makiing laugh with your frustration. All the best in the contest, fingers crossed you win the prize…writing has it’s ups and downs you are in the motions and am glad you are going with the flow…never fight it 🙂


    • Jackie September 13, 2011 at 8:43 pm #

      Thanks, Vee 🙂 I really appreciate the encouragement.


  2. misswhiplash September 6, 2011 at 9:56 am #

    Aha! Jackie what a great idea! I won’t enter the competition because that would not be fair, you deserve a chance to win BUT I might well use the prompt. As soon as I read it ideas popped into my head.

    Stop whipping yourself girlie, there is nothing wrong with the posts that you write. You are always entertaining and isn’t that what it’s all about

    Go and have your holiday, rest awhile, then start again…writing

    and the best of luck with your new project


    • Jackie September 13, 2011 at 8:40 pm #

      LOL Nice P. Thanks as always for the encouragement. This essay is due in two days and I haven’t yet begun….


  3. Lian September 6, 2011 at 11:53 am #

    I’m sure you’ll do great in the writing contest! I’m loving what you write here every single day. And on that note: please, please keep writing every day next year, and the years after that!


    • Jackie September 13, 2011 at 8:40 pm #

      Every day next year?! That’s a lot. Like, a lot. Also, sometimes I want to die when I think about having to write something even though I have nothing to write.

      That’s right: death.


  4. Jules September 6, 2011 at 12:26 pm #

    Deal. The blog really does need a pick-me-up, aesthetic wise. ;D

    Good luck and have fun!


    • Jackie September 13, 2011 at 8:39 pm #

      Would you believe I’ve been through TWO artists already? Two. It’s coming. Supposedly. Ugh.


  5. Samantha September 6, 2011 at 3:12 pm #

    No pressure, but please keep blogging! I’ve only recently begun reading your blog and it’s wonderfully entertaining. It’s also great that you have something new every day…helps me keep enough reading material to last the day. 🙂

    Good luck on the writing contest!


    • Jackie September 13, 2011 at 8:38 pm #

      Oyeeee pressure. LOL Thanks.


  6. pickle September 6, 2011 at 10:04 pm #

    Your lollipop Tuesdays have inspired me…I will be trying swing club on Friday! I have two left feet when it comes to dancing and I’m kinda nervous but hey if you can enter a pinball competition, make a hanging herb garden, bake a pie and a plethora of other things, I can definitely try dancing…oh dear, what am I getting myself into?!?!?


    • Jackie September 13, 2011 at 8:38 pm #

      How did it go!?

      That sounds wonderful. Don’t get me wrong – frightening absolutely. But nonetheless there’s gotta be some fun in there. I found disappointingly few details on your blog 😉 Feel free to enlighten me/us.


      • pickle September 14, 2011 at 6:28 pm #

        It went….well it went. I can successfully do the Mona Lisa without inflicting harm upon myself, my partner, or any bystanders. I am definitely not a dancer and it probably didn’t help that my partner had no idea how to dance either so I mostly led. It was fun to try but it is not for me…and I have a bad history with one of the presidents. We pretty much loathe each other because we were in band together in jr high and she was serious about it and I was…not. But I can successfully waltz!


        • Jackie September 15, 2011 at 12:48 am #

          I don’t know what the Mona Lisa is but I’m amused that you’ve associated it with inflicting harm. LOL @ Band Drama. And grats on the waltz – even that’s an accomplishment for such left-footed folk as me. Hey – awesome regardless. Grats on doing something out of your comfort zone!


    • pickle September 15, 2011 at 10:02 pm #

      Thanks Jackie! Love your blog…Always look forward to Lollipop Tuesday 🙂


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