Free Lola

18 Dec

This morning I woke up to my cat leaping over my face like Free Willy.

I was nestling in the arms of sweet, warm slumber when I heard the jingle of a small bell and felt the woosh of air over my face (along with the slight brush of fur from her floppy feline stomach).  By the time I fully came to, the tinkle of her bell was across the room and she was casually poised by the doorway as if just entering the room.

Lies.

Ever wake up to a cat looming over you? I have. It's terrifying.

I think sometimes of how I’d like to set up a small camera over my bed so that I can see what my cats do while I’m sleeping.  I’m sure they exhibit a variety of unacceptable behaviors that would just further enrage me.  I read somewhere that people who let their pets sleep with them have their sleep disturbed a lot more throughout the evening than those who do not.  I thought it made a lot of sense and decided to close my bedroom door from that day forward so as to drinking the nectar of slumber in peace.  But Lola pawed the door to bump it and make this ever so slight thudding sound that I would hear just as I was drifting to sleep.  I would try to wait her out, convinced that if I just ignored it she would give up and go away.  But she’s stubborn and when I didn’t open to door in response to her pawing, she scratched.

It’s hard to sleep when you’re envisioning your security deposit burning up in hellfire.

So of course I let her in, knowing full well that all I did was validate her actions.  From then on she knew that even if it took a full fifteen minutes to get me to do so, she would get in.

And now she Free Willys over my face at night.  So there’s that.

I think this will be the beginning of a lengthy experiment.  How can I get my cats to leave me alone when I’m sleeping without waking me up from desperate pawing, scratching, meowing, or other enraging behaviors?  I predict it will involve a lot of cat nip.  I’m not above drugging them.

Let’s hope this isn’t indicative of my future parenting methods.

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13 Responses to “Free Lola”

  1. Lori December 18, 2011 at 2:51 pm #

    Sneaky.

    What do Kendall and I do when the cats don’t want to respect closed doors and let us sleep? Ear plugs. Considering that at our last apartment, on any given morning at 7am you would wake up to someone blasting the Backstreet Boys or whatever song is at the top of the Latino Pop Billboards, ear plugs have been a great life decision.

    Like

    • Jackie December 23, 2011 at 1:36 pm #

      but even just *knowing* that they’re clawing up my security deposit keeps me awake. it isn’t the sound so much as the reality. ugh.

      Like

  2. Slippers the Cat December 18, 2011 at 3:34 pm #

    Would you remind Lola of that time I stuck my entire paw inside Jeff’s mouth as he was asleep? Her, Hobbes, and I were sitting around playing truth or dare, and she dared me to do it. (That’s also the same night we dared Hobbes to make out with Rizzo Memphis, but let’s not talk about that.) Anyways, Ever since that dare I’ve continued to use this method to awaken the people feeding me and it never fails. I’ve tried telling Lola to do this but she doesn’t have the guts. Oh Lola, how I miss you.

    P.S. you’re alright too Jackie.

    Like

  3. Jules December 18, 2011 at 5:35 pm #

    When you found out, let me know. Kk?

    Like

    • Jackie December 23, 2011 at 1:35 pm #

      There are some fab tips in here. I love the aluminum foil one – not sure if it works yet though.

      Like

  4. whatimeant2say December 18, 2011 at 6:04 pm #

    I just put the pillow over my head. Suffocating myself seems to work for some reason.

    Like

    • Jackie December 23, 2011 at 1:35 pm #

      LOL I dont know if I’m gonna try that one 😉

      Like

  5. thesinglecell December 18, 2011 at 8:01 pm #

    Mine often winds up sleeping on my head. I move her and she comes right back. She does sleep most of the time that I’m sleeping, but she always has to be ON me. Then in the morning she wakes me up by sniffing my eyeballs and attempting to pat my face without clawing me to shreds. (Note the word “attempting.”)

    Like

    • Jackie December 23, 2011 at 1:35 pm #

      you know, my cat has NEVER slept on my head, but after I read this comment, Hobbes walked right up to the top of my bed, and settled in right on it. I think he’s bugged my computer.

      Like

  6. Amy December 19, 2011 at 3:57 am #

    Soleil quit sneaking up on me so much when she accidentally got shoved off the bed when she forgot to be quite so stealth-like. When I tell her to find her spot she will usually do it a little faster now. Chloe just waits until I settle in and then curls up behind my knees and goes to sleep like a good girl. Cats….gotta love em (or they’ll kill you).

    Like

    • Jackie December 23, 2011 at 1:32 pm #

      LOL awwww. You have great cat names, btw!

      Like

  7. lys810 December 20, 2011 at 4:34 pm #

    Tape a large piece of aluminum foil in front of the door, so that in order to get in the room, the cat would have to step on it.
    Cat’s hate that stuff, but I’m not sure why…

    Like

    • Jackie December 23, 2011 at 1:02 pm #

      whaaaaaaaat!? Beautiful! Why did I never think of this? Totally going to try it. thanks 🙂

      Like

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