Puppy Amusement Parks: My Next Million Dollar Idea

20 Mar

You know - like this. Except instead of leaping over barbed wire, they'd be leaping over giant Snausages. Awesome.

I know my million dollar ideas don’t typically work out and that’s why I’m blabbering away on a corner of the Internet instead of on TV selling ideas to people.  But hey – one of these is going to hit a homer.  I just know it.

Today’s million dollar idea?  Puppy Amusement Parks.

There are tons of people that want to have a dog but can’t because of their life situation.  Me, for example.  I love the guys but I just can’t have one in my apartment.  I couldn’t give one enough space for it to be happy, I couldn’t be home often enough to spend time with it, and I can’t afford to feed one and buy it all the awesome things I will want to give it for being so darn adorable.

But I’ll tell ya – on a day as beautiful as yesterday was, I really wish I had one to strut around the neighborhood.

On a gorgeous day, the first thing I do when I wake up is thank God for the super awesome day.  And then I wish for a puppy.  Because what’s the sense in a gorgeous day if you don’t have a dog to take to the park during it?

That’s where Puppy Amusement Parks come in.

You know what would be so much cooler than an animal shelter?  An non-profit animal amusement park.  I’ll just create a super awesome dog utopia and house as many dogs as can comfortably and happily live in that space as possible.  And I’ll charge admission to humans.

Think about it.  The dogs get people to play with them, they get state-of-the-art dog equipment, and people get attached to a particular dog during their time there, perhaps they’ll even give it a good home.

Of course, I’d have to hire vets and animal folks of different shapes and sizes and whatnot.  And the money spent on a ticket price can go toward the cost of housing, treating, and showering the dogs in love and affection 24-7. But designing the place will be loads of fun.  I could just throw a bunch of little kids in a room and have them dream up the place.  Heck, I could run a contest at schools all over the nation to dream up the most awesome dog utopia they can think of and use it as a way to boost awareness of local shelters.    I’ll bet five-year-olds can dream up some pretty slammin’ dog superparks.

I’m thinking a Seuss-y look would be cool, but that will be my backup plan in case the 5-year-olds don’t work out.

But they will.  They’re brilliant.

And if you don’t like this idea, then you must hate puppies and little kids.  Those are the only reasons I will accept.

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19 Responses to “Puppy Amusement Parks: My Next Million Dollar Idea”

  1. Patrecia aka Misswhiplash March 20, 2011 at 9:29 am #

    I want to volunteer, and can I bring my five dogs with me?

    My idea was to open a home for all dogs that wanted to come, no walls to keep them in , just wander in and out . That way there would not be any homeless unwanted dogs. But my husband says 5 dogs is 5 too many and I haven’t got the cash to fund such a dream, not very practical anyway….

    Have a barking good day! woof! woof!

    Like

    • Jackie March 20, 2011 at 10:58 am #

      That would be so wonderful. Leave it up to the husband to be practical 🙂 I would be so happy forever if I could turn this into a reality. Doesn’t it sound like a great time?

      Thanks for stopping by. If some incredible investor checks out my site and offers to fund my million-dollar ideas, I’ll be sure to ask if you’re still interested in volunteering 🙂

      Like

  2. The_Observationalist_NYC March 20, 2011 at 9:42 am #

    This is actually the most brilliant idea ever- why hasn’t this been done?

    There are two dog-runs near my apartment. Yes, the dog enjoys going to them; but they’re just a rectangular fenced in TILED area. How long can running around in that be? Imagine some puppy-appropriate roller coasters and midway rides. I’m on board for it.

    Like

    • Jackie March 20, 2011 at 10:59 am #

      woohoo! I’ll add you to the customer base as soon as the investor comes by. 🙂

      Like

  3. j. March 20, 2011 at 1:44 pm #

    I’ll volunteer my pre-schoolers for the design team! The most incredible ideas come out of their heads. I’m sure they’ll do it if I promise a field trip to visit the puppies.

    I’ve been following your blog about two weeks now, and, while Miss Manners doesn’t cover the topic, that seems like the proper amount of time to wait before posting a reply. Thanks for sharing, I’ve enjoyed getting a daily chuckle.

    Like

    • Jackie March 20, 2011 at 2:25 pm #

      I’m so glad to know you’re a regular reader! Especially if it means you can pull together my design team 😉 If you ever decide to charge them with it, throw their results on your blog and drop me a line! 🙂 Thanks for reading – I truly appreciate it.

      Like

  4. Tammy March 20, 2011 at 1:47 pm #

    this is an awesome idea. I love it. Sounds like great fun. I would even come visit to pet the puppies. I, as well as you, can’t have dogs in my place. Maybe for the summer we should both go to the SPCA and walk the puppies there so we can get our exercise and get to love those puppies also. You may have something here.

    Like

    • Jackie March 20, 2011 at 2:27 pm #

      Hey I’m all for it – but I’m pretty sure I’d bawl my eyes out having to leave them there at the end of the day. Find me an investor and we’ll go in on the endeavor together. Post-retirement project? 😛

      Like

  5. Operation Fuzzy Mice March 20, 2011 at 6:02 pm #

    You run the dog-side of the park, and I’ll run the cat-side. 😀 My guys luuuuuuurv their visitors!

    Like

    • Jackie March 20, 2011 at 6:36 pm #

      All right but I’m going to make the cat side a cafe. It’s been working wonders in Tokyo and I already promised it to my readers in a previous blog post here You can totally manage Jackie’s Cat Cafe. First step is to find a better name 😉

      Like

  6. robinbarr March 21, 2011 at 6:04 am #

    Jackie – since you shared yours, I’ll share mine, also dog recreation. I would love to build an indoor dog park with a glass ceiling so dogs can still enjoy laying in the sun, yet have it climate controlled and provide a great place to play even if its raining. There would be a designated area for each of several sizes of small dogs, ie. teacup,maltese; and the same for medium and large sized dogs. It would not be a free facility, because the following would have to be paid for: Playtime for one hour at a time starting at the top of the hour. Then all dogs are retrieved by their owners, and the floor areas are all cleaned in a way to neutralize all odor, destroy germs, and dry very quickly so the next groups of dogs can enter their respect play areas quickly. Dogs would not be allowed to participate until their parents have provided proof of vaccines and a quick check by a staff member for fleas. A portion of each dog play area would have agility equipment set up with a staff member for those dogs interested to participate. Each dog would be encouraged to try it if the dog’s parent approves. Staff members would also be available to play and run with dogs that seem to want to play and run but haven’t had the right dog show up for that on that particular day. Dogs’paws are cleaned by a staff member upon leaving. Open 7 days a week, 9am-10pm 7 days/week.

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  7. Lian March 21, 2011 at 11:17 am #

    Great idea! I would love to have a dog but can’t keep it in my tiny student room either. Also, I’m afraid the dog wouldn’t be happy since I’m really lazy and would not invest all needed time to walk him. The puppy amusement park is a great alternative!

    Like

  8. usalitterking February 5, 2012 at 10:12 am #

    Jackie , will your puppy amusement park have puppy merry -go – rounds , air swings, water slides – puupy zip lines – puppy bungy jumping – puppy roller coasters , etc —I would be willing to pay 20 bucks to see my little sitzu on all those rides and you would have to have puppy energy stations !

    Like

    • Jackie February 7, 2012 at 11:53 pm #

      I think everything except roller coasters. Cost of maintenance, you know. Plus, a malfunctioning roller coaster full of puppies would be absolutely tragic.

      Like

  9. Ara August 20, 2012 at 10:27 pm #

    This is awesome. I want in. This is a great idea, and also a great idea is the indoor doggie park. I am going to put these on the top of my business idea list, because I see this as an opportunity in every city across the nation, and I definitely want in when I see the opportunity to start this.

    Like

    • Jackie August 22, 2012 at 11:45 am #

      okay go find a bunch of money and report back.

      Like

  10. Leadell April 22, 2015 at 10:42 pm #

    This would be a great concept also if people would show this much love to human beings especially children and seniors there are so many in our foster care and social services, senior housing that are alone across the U.S. They could truly lLove a day of hugs and kisses too I see much more attention payed to animals than to humans So Sad.

    Like

    • Jackie May 1, 2015 at 11:48 pm #

      Hmm… not sure a senior day park has quite the same ring to it, but I’m picking up what you’re putting down 😉

      On Wed, Apr 22, 2015 at 10:42 PM, The Jackie Blog wrote:

      >

      Like

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. A Bride’s Guide for the Anxious, Awkward, and Broke | The Jackie Blog - May 22, 2017

    […] think this is in the realm of my million dollar idea series (along with Puppy Amusement Parks). We send invitations out to people to let them know we’re getting married. To celebrate, we […]

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